No One Will Understand

Hi. :)

Not feeling so well these days.
I'm sick and I should take care of myself, because I'm not with my parents and I live alone here. I got a headache and a kind of fever. Just need some rest.

And I've been so gloomy. Got problems. Its about my feelings. I think that they are just so unfair. They told me to forget all of my feelings for him. But when someone in my group fall in love, they still allowed him. He even put his crush face on his wallpaper. And our leader saw it, she just act like nothing. What was that mean?? Why I can't normally fall in love with someone just like the other. Is fall in love forbidden for me? Why I can't just love someone?

And I feel so alone these days. I feel so far away from family. No one to rely on. I feel that I'm kinda useless. They never involve me in their activity. I feel like I'm the only stranger there. They have so many secrets that never let me know. They told me that they'll make me feel like they are my second family, my second mother. But I just feel like a stupid stranger.

I've tried so long, I've tried so hard to stay strong. But I can't stand it anymore. I'm tired of everything. They make me feel that my self full of hate. I once decided to quit. But I'm telling my self that I must stay strong even I'm useless, nobody likes me, no body needs me. But now, I can't stand it anymore. I really want to quit. All of them make me feel like a stupid stranger around people that busy with themselves. I don't feel like I'm around my family like they told me before.

For whoever read this, don't ever think bad about me, cause you will agree with me if you get the same problem with me. And if I'm too selfish about my own opinion I'm sorry

That's all

Thanks for reading my useless post. :)

God bless you



=HUGS&KISSES=